1) Under the weather
Well, we’re all technically under the weather…or in the weather…and what kind of weather are we talking about? Sunshine? Clouds? Storms?
2) It’s all Greek to me
I have just one question: what do the Greeks say?
3) Don’t put all your eggs in one basket
Whoever makes egg cartons has obviously never heard of this.
4) A Piece of Cake
What exactly is easy about a piece of cake? Frankly, cake can be hard and messy to eat. I’m confused.
5) Apple of my eye
Since when do eyes have apples?
6) Once in a blue moon
I propose the start of a new idiom: once in a purple moon.
7) Break a leg
8) Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth
And a gift horse would be…? A horse someone gave to you as a gift? A horse you give to someone else as a gift? And what’s up with looking it in the mouth? Normal people look things in the eye. But maybe it’s normal to look horses in the mouth. Or maybe just gift horses, I don’t know.
9) Hold your horses
If I had any horses I’m not sure I could physically hold them. They look like they’d be heavy.
10) Icing on the cake
This idiom is backwards. It should be “cake on the icing” because everyone knows that without icing cake is meaningless.
11) Let the cat out of the bag
Who put that poor cat in the bag? And since when would letting it out be something bad? To whoever instigated this phrase: I’m calling animal control.
12) Like a chicken with its head cut off
13) Out of the blue
Why not out of the green? Or out of the pink? Ooh, yes, I like that one.
14) Put a sock in it
…Just why? Why would you put a sock in someone’s mouth to shut them up? Is this a clean or dirty sock we’re talking about? These are important questions.
15) Rule of Thumb
Rule of…pinky? And what would the rule of the middle finger be…?
16) Spitting image
17) The whole nine yards
Why 9? Why not the whole eight yards? I need to know.
18) Til the cows come home
Maybe this would make sense if your cow is the one that jumped over the moon. I hate to break it to you, but I don’t think that one’s coming back any time soon.
19) Your guess is as good as mine
But what if you’re talking to a construction worker (for example) and they’re asking you why their work is going slow? Their guess might actually be better than yours. Though I don’t know why they’d be asking you in the first place.
20) You are what you eat
I kind of like this one, actually. After all, we eat so many different things throughout the day and each person consists of many different ideas, attitudes, and feelings. Both our diets and personalities are complex. Congrats to this idiom for actually saying something true without meaning to!